While my husband was away on business we had the misfortune of having our car broken into. I called my husband when I found our car vandalized and undrivable so he could take care of the insurance company. He made a few calls and I specifically asked him not to tell his parents as they are indeed ‘My Crazy In-Laws’. My husband later calls me back with the insurance details and while we are talking on the phone, I spy a man nosing around our car. I discover it is my father-in-law and of course ask my husband why he sent his father over after I had asked him specifically not to. My husband defended himself and said he only called to ask about the insurance company and that was it. So I go outside to see what my FIL wants and when he gets a glimpse of me coming he ducks behind the car and proceeds to try to leave. I then waved at him so he knew I saw him and he sheepishly came out to talk to me. I showed him the damage; he lingered a bit and then left. My car was towed away and it really bothers me that my in-laws never once called me to see how things were going. Not once did they ask if I needed a ride anywhere or offer to help me out. No, my in-laws are just unhelpful people who like to be nosey!
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We were planning our wedding and there was one aunt who really wanted to be a part of the wedding in some way. So I first asked her if she would be interested in taking some pictures at the wedding. She said no to that but was interested in being the person who told the hired photographer what to do, and I said no to that. She is a talented seamstress so I asked if she would make this very simple white dress for our flowers girl and of course she said no. I asked her if she would help by either helping cut cake or serve punch and she said no. She had the nerve to tell me that “I want to do something important for your wedding” and yet everything I honestly wanted her to do she said no to. In the end my other 3 aunts ended up having a great time serving cake together, and this difficult aunt spend the day sulking. A week later my mother told me that this aunt said she was hurt because she did not get a special aunty flower corsage like my other cake serving aunts got! It was a sad realization when I discovered that my side of the family was showing the early signs of becoming the crazy in-laws!
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In the eyes of my mother-in-law I am the tramp who has ruined her son’s life. My poor husband has to put up with not only my stress about the situation but also hearing all sorts of crap from his ignorant mother and controlling sister. One day when his mother was droning on about the latest dilemma I had supposedly caused my husband finally had enough and gave her a piece of his mind. Whatever he said must have worked, because he immediately called me and warned that his mother was calling to apologize for treating me so horribly. His only request was that I hear what she has to say. So the phone rang, and it was my MIL. She went on about how she has tried so hard to make me feel welcome and to get to know me. I of course disagree -this is the woman who does not even make eye contact with my while at our home for coffee. I asked her to kindly give me an example of how she had done her best and she immediately says this: “Well, you remember how I asked you about what you were going to do when your husband was out of town for two weeks? Well, I was hoping that you would say you didn’t know so I could then ask you if you wanted to come over for supper one night.” Seriously, this is how the woman tries hard! Somehow she still managed to spin it so it was my fault entirely that all her efforts were useless in trying to get to know me!
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Growing up my family was not big on birthdays; however my husband’s family goes a bit overboard. They are so into birthdays that my sister-in-law was sure to invite us to dinner for her birthday 4 months in advance. They put so much emphasis on gift giving and how much the gifts cost that I feel like I am only renting their friendship depending on how much I paid up on the last gift. I have even been criticized by my sister-in-law for only giving a card to their grandmother for her 84th birthday. My birthday is five months away and the in-laws are already asking my husband about different gift ideas for me. These are very expensive gifts, hundreds of dollars. I have no intention of throwing myself a large scale party and inviting only my in-laws over so I can be bought. Why is it so hard for them to understand that I do not want their money, I just want them to treat me like a human being with feelings. Their love is for sell, but mine is not, and I will not be bought by these shallow, materialistic people.
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My sister-in-law is a very talented manipulator. She has this ability to control her parents and grandparents and turn them against anyone she desires. This woman lives a very sad life, kind of like a cat-lady without the cats. She likes it when people feel sorry for her, and somehow can make herself the victim in every situation. Yesterday, this dear person was complaining to my husband about how they never get to spend time with each other. My husband reminder her of all the times we invited her over for dinner, on shopping trips, movies and game nights with friends. Her reply was: “Well, you always invite me to movies that I do not want to see, over for food that I do not like and over to your house when you have other friends over.” Absolutely hopeless! I can only think of three times she even tried to have us over, and each of those times she needed some plumbing or electrical work done by my husband. I do not know what planet she is from, but here on earth things don’t work that way!
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My mother in law was fine during my pregnancy except she would constantly refer to my son as 'my baby'. She had also laughingly referred to me during my pregnancy as just the 'vessel'. This didn't bother me so much at the time but I would soon be changing my mind.
My labour took a turn for the worse and I ended up needing an emergency c-section. I woke up 45 minutes after my sons birth completely shattered and not at my most dignified to see my mother in law standing next to my bedside. What’s worse is that she was cuddling my new born son at the time when I hadn't even gotten to do that yet. She couldn't wait to get her greedy paws on him. Who on earth thinks its ok to cuddle someone's new born baby before it's own parent is even awake from major abdominal surgery?
And then of course I was the worst mother ever by wanting to breast feed my son. She turned round and said 'well, how am I supposed to feed him? '. I said, 'you're not, that's why I’m his mother'. He was learning how to breastfeed and I commented that he was feeding very well. She said that we would have to get him used to a bottle as well so 'that granny can feed him well'.
She has been getting on my nerves ever since the birth. But DH had turned round to my family and told them that his family hadn't seen DS yet. So I can’t rant to my family and if I say anything about it to DH it causes an argument. Grrr.
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We had just refinished our bathroom and I was looking forward to finally having matching rugs, curtain and towels. My birthday was coming up and my sister-in-law and mother-in-law asked me what I would like for my birthday. I mentioned that we had just finished the bathroom and told them that it would be nice to have matching lavender towels to go with the paint. I showed them the bathroom and they agreed that my husband had done a nice job and it looked great. They even complimented me on the color choice. On the way out the door I could hear my mother-in-law comment to herself “those young brides have to coordinate everything”- I was annoyed, but rolled my eyes and went on with my day. I mean come on; they are the ones that asked what I wanted! So the next week what did I get for my birthday? You guessed it… ORANGE towels. They seriously went out and purchased orange towels after they had seen the new lavender paint. Where can you even find orange towels?
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My husband and I just gave birth to child number four and are loving having our hands full with loving kids. Our 9 year old has downs and is a handful to deal with. Many people do not understand him and it is always a challenge for him when we go on family trips. One such trip was to my SIL's house, who is in her 40's, single and with no children. While we were there our son was misbehaving (he was squirming in his chair a lot enjoying the squeaking noise it made). My SIL was getting very annoyed with him and decided to take matters into her own hands by yelling at the top of her lungs at him. That only made things worse and my husband and I spend hours getting him calmed down. After he went to sleep, my SIL decided that she should approach us for what she called an "Intervention". She proceeded to tell my husband and I how we are raising our children wrong and how she had all the answers for us. Of course this childless 40 year old began her speech by saying "I know what you are going through am a preschool teacher, I understand children". I am sorry, but being a preschool teacher for two years does not make you a child expert no more than standing in a garage makes you a car!
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I am sure almost every woman has had the issue with the maddening MIL commenting on the cleanliness of the house. When my MIL comes over she likes to point out the little things I miss, and of course she tries to put it nicely by say "˜Dear, you missed a spot there" while rubbing imaginary dust between her fingers. She has done this a few times in front of my husband and he does stick up for me. She is also in the habit of bringing cleaners over for me and making sure to explain to me in great detail how to use it correctly. On one visit to my MIL and FIL house my MIL was asking how I liked using the new cleaners- before she could finish her question I caught a twinkle in my FIL's eye. My FIL smiled, winked at me and then said to my MIL, "Dear, you missed a spot" and proceeded to rub imaginary dust between his fingers. Good thing I have a great FIL to balance out my crazy MIL!
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Yet another case of the perfect in-laws until the wedding day happened! My mother-in-law was so nice to me during the planning of our wedding. She seemed to like everything that I did and I truly believed that problems with "the in-laws" was nothing more than an urban myth. It came time for the big day and my ridiculous mother-in-law threw a fit when she discovered our wedding was outdoors and not in a church. Mind you she had been in on the planning the entire time. She now believes that our marriage is not legitimate because we were not married in a church. Say what you will about that, but this woman is living with her ex-husband and has not stepped foot in a church willingly for many years. Shame on me for having a heathen wedding in all the beauty of God's creation!
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